changes in altitudes

Chronicling Colorado con jobs in the Denver Post this morning after that 'balloon boy' hoax and fraudulent JonBenet Ramsey murder confession that dominated media outlets for days on end, I too am beginning to see a pattern here. Just look closely at the events leading up to this moment and then at the curious behavior of the parties involved after the fact. This is is not how normal people react in these situations. My highly developed critical thinking and deductive reasoning skills tell me there is more to this than meets the eye. Much, much more.

Could it be that the Centennial State is covertly writing scams in a ploy to divert attention away from Florida, according to Carl Hiaasen the paradise of scandals and the most bizarre state in the union?

It is probably more likely these events are evidence of some dark and evil cover-up by the best-selling author Hiaasen , the scene staged so he can flee the pressure of life in the Keys for the sensational stories he could write about at higher altitudes.

I can only imagine the poetic justice Carl would bring to Steve Thomas or the Captain High Pants fiasco. Well, on second thought, maybe not. Hiaasen's stories are based on reality so those colorful characters are perfectly suited for another twisted tale by Tim Dorsey.

Sorry Carl.

But seriously now, back to the real evidence. I am on to something very sinister here. I feel it in my gut after the 118th replay of the 60 Minutes interview with Hiaasen. He is hiding something; just watch how he blinked. And licked his lips.

Hiaasen has stated, publicly I might add, that there are contracts and lawyers involved so one doesn't have to get up very early in the morning to unwind the spin and expose a mass of suspicious contradictions. For instance, in one interview Hiaasen says he loathes having his picture taken. But go ahead, google him, and you too can see his pictures plastered all over the Internet, book backs and in newspaper articles. Busted!

It is just too easy to connect the dots and expose the truth about this dastardly cover-up conspiracy that reeks from wearing the same headphones two days in a row.

But here is the smoking gun: just replace Colorado (or JonBenet Ramsey was murdered by her parents theorists) for Florida when Hiaasen, in his very own words, describes his home state:

"The Sunshine State is a paradise of scandals teeming with drifters, deadbeats, and misfits drawn here by some dark primordial calling like demented trout..." --

Are we really that gullible? A history of Colorado hoaxes
Published in the Denver Post
By Dan Haley and Tom Noel with research from Jan Torpy and Barbara Hudson

"It should be no surprise that the balloon boy hoax was perpetrated here in Colorado. Our state was, essentially, founded on a hoax...

Daniel C. Oakes, the first documented Colorado hoaxer, wrote a 1859 guide book purporting to provide the speediest route to a Pikes Peak fortune. Oakes assured folks that "the whole country between the Cache la Poudre and Cherry Creek is a beautiful rich valley full of mountain streams of living water and exceedingly rich in gold."...

Here's our Hall of Shame of Colorado hoaxes:

2008 — Richard Glen Strandlof misled veterans, politicians and voters by claiming to be Rick Duncan..

August 2006 — His dazed stare, ill-fitting shirt and high-waisted pants, the strange way in which Thai authorities paraded him before the media — it had all the markings of a bad joke. But then-District Attorney Mary Lacy seemed to think John Mark Karr might have actually killed JonBenet Ramsey, so she dragged the odd bird from Thailand to Boulder for a DNA test. Karr started the hoax that he was with the former Little Miss Colorado when she died. Heck, nothing says "I love you" like confessing to a crime you didn't commit that carries a life sentence.

1993 — Gail Levine had all of us peering into our Pepsi cans after she claimed to have found a syringe inside hers..."[...read more]



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